Terror on Two Legs

Sometimes, I could just throttle my four-year old. Make that my four-and-a-half year old-- an age which she very proudly exclaims when she is being either exceptionally annoying or exceptionally charming.  It's usually the former.

I don't know why Vivi and I butt heads but that seems to be all we do lately.  This morning when I met her in the hallway with my usual greeting, "Good Morning!  I am so happy to see you."  She responded with, "You are a gross woman."  It's true that I had not brushed my teeth nor was I wearing pants but I think I deserve a little more respect than that.

That is just one example of the nastiness.  Vivi has called me an idiot, a rat, told me that she hated me, threatened to kick me in the face, and proclaimed that she would "kill me in real life." (My mother would say that this is my comeuppance but my nastiness didn't really come out until high school which, at the very least, is expected.)

This all started around the time she turned three and her sisters came along.  I think it is a safe bet to say that Jude and Ellie threw us all for a gigantic loop but Vivi was likely the most affected. Everyone told me she would get used to it and it would be better but a year and a half later, it has not improved.  In fact, it seems to be worse.  We have a zero tolerance policy for name-calling and hitting but all the time-outs and cool-downs in the world aren't helping.

So, in the interest of either self-destruction or promoting our mother-daughter bond (I've yet to decide which it is), I am taking Vivi to North Carolina on Thursday.  It will be just the two of us and we are going to visit my sister, Vivi's beloved Aunt Katie.  I hope that all the attention and one-on-one time will be good for her and help improve her behavior... if only for four days.

Comments

  1. bear in mind, even kids with no twinsisters turn into hellions... HELLions. like onions, only worse.

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  2. so so sorry. Remember this stuff, write a book. It's funny. Until you remember that it's actually happening. Hope you get some time to sooth your hurting heart too.

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  3. yeah, it was meant as encouragement. i do love me some onions... :) good travels, lady...

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  4. No worries...my 5-year-old son is quite the potty mouth too! Driving me NUTS. I find that following the suggestions in "Connection Parenting" book by Pam Leo is helpful. The fact that our kids are using harsh words means that they are feeling something that bothers them-need to address that feeling and resolve it and they will stop saying mean things. My son used to say that he wanted me to die on a daily basis! I had to not take it personally and address his feelings, help him find a nicer way to expressing them without hurting others. It took a while but he hasn't said that in a really long time. Good luck!

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  5. Thanks Keri, I'll have to look into that book.

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